So it's 10:55am and I just woke up on the floor in the hallway on the4th floor. There should probably be no moredrinking competetions.
Ha i know. My vag can't go too crazy for a boy halfway across the country. It doesn't have that good of range
every time you feel disappointed with the red wings take a shot
new low.... made out with someone while peeing
The last thing i remember was high fiving everyone on the planet.
My aunt totally just drunk dialed me when i was super stoned, it was so intense
He showed up drunk to my cousions HS grad party, we stayed at the bars till 2, then he got up at 5 to run a half marathon and by the time I woke up wlhe was already back and drinking.
Apparently we both projectiled on Erin at the same time.
That's some true roommate bonding right there.
I'm going to empty my bank account and roll around in the cash. Want to join?
I've already dropped her on the ground of a crowded bar dancing , been incoherent drunk to the point i couldn't speak and came within 2 seconds all on separate evenings so at this point she should know what I'm about
I was packing a bowl naked and her dog just stared at me with pure rage
I've spent all afternoon taking and editing selfies. The life of a bimbo is truly tiring.
I'm not sorry for loving America more than everyone else
The bump on my forehead, i think, was from falling asleep at front door, on my knees, slumped over. But we played good music so what?
Damn him and his beautiful face and body and penis.
Randomize
