How do you get a cum stain out of a trampoline?
Going back to college after four years is reminding me why i love cheating... they dont let me cheat on tests but they sure try hard to make me cheat on my girl
i just identified you from a description of your pipe
There was a guy running for some position in our government named "young boozer" hell yes I voted for him
i left with the words "thank you for undersanding my sluttiness"
We tried. It's impossible to cum while bouncing on a trampoline. It's like trying to sneeze while keeping your eyes open.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
They got me high and left me at the mall with a giftcard for $400. I need an adult.
Because i love you. And people show love by not letting their friends shit themselves.
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
There's nothing more rewarding than telling you that I fucked your dad
She broke up with me. I guess I was in the most chaste lesbian relationship in the history of the world and had no idea.
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize