Crosby and Malkin: Two girls, one cup.
i feel like an archaelogyst. im pulling apart last weeks brownies to find the weed in them
I came downstairs to find I had missed the 3some on my kitchen floor but not the pukefest or ER trip after it. This is what happens when the voice of reason is otherwise occupied
How do I tactfully ask if the neighbors downstairs can hear me beating it?
I'm gonna sleep with her just to prove to my roomate that shes a slut and he's wasting his time
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
You know how girls with huge tits have back problems? Do you get knee problems or something?
I'm doing laundry from this weekend.. That poor shirt I wore to the rave smells like a dead animal that rolled in weed and pain..
I just sent you a multitude of sexual pictures...and you responded with a Charles Dickens Quote.
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
You took all of your clothes off and tried to seduce me and while trying to seduce me you decided you were too drunk and passed out.
THERE IS A MAN IN THE BATHROOM IN COLONIAL GARB GET HERE
My sinuses still burn from snorting red wine last night.
This friendship isnt goin to work if you dont respond to my drunk texts
Randomize