Do you think they'll have a special part during the BET awards for Michael Jackson even though he turned white?
is her vagina suppost to smell like dirty taco bell?
Just woke up with 34 slim-jims in my pocket. Too afraid to check the others.
I honestly didn't see the problem playing beer pong In the car on the road trip home.
Theres a picture of you hanging up on the wall in mcdonalds, i'm impressed
I had a guy present me his prison release form this morning as id
Why are there sofa cushions on the floor? And why isn't there a sofa in this room that doesn't have cushions?
Nothing like a marijuana chart of usage in each country to make me understand math.
Let's just say trying to drink my weight in apple pie shots looked better in theory.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
They made out. Sounded like hippos drinking water
Who would've thought that Monopoly night would've ended with some girl peeing on the couch.
You're 31, how do you still outdrink all these college kids?
Practice, Irish genes, and a lack of desire to live past 40. But mostly practice.
You know what would have been funny if we got arrested last night? The inventory search of the lock box:\n\nContents:\n1 work ID\n1 33 round Glock magazine\n1 set of keys\n1 vibrator\n2 bags fruit snacks\n1 parking hang tag
Not to be hella graphic on main but I just came so hard I think I saw a new color.
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