Drank beer out of a hotwheels bucket all night
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
how do flat chested girls get laid?
His hospital is closing...I consider it "sorry you're losing your job" sex.
They both invited me to family dinner Sunday. Secretly dating two sisters just got real.
Just coat-checked 2 backpacks full of 40's...it was the bouncer's idea.
I guess I'm in a committed relationship. We just had shot 1 of 3 of Gardasil. I'm now dead inside.
Sorry I kept grabbing your vagina at the casino. I believed it was my lucky unicorn to win bonuses
Dude so coolest charity idea ever, think aids walk but instead of miles you drink beers oh the possibilities
I let a drunk, gay man in a dragon costume motor-boat me. With his dragon head.
Clearly it doesn't get better with age. Just more sexual
Literally had to stick my hands in my pants and hold my butt cheeks together while driving
yea sometimes its awkward. but when you're a straight bartender at a gay bar and everyone knows it, they all think that they can make me turn gay. its like oh yea dude that extra $20 tip makes me want to suck some dick now
Well my mom knows that the welt I had on my forehead last month was the result of a sex accident. This holiday sucks
I didn't expect the hobit to have that much sexual tension.
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