how do you clear previous safari searches on an iPhone? i asked my brother to google something for me and "big penis" "empire chinese food" and "reverse cowgirl" popped up.
Do you ever think that bumblebee is the gay transformer?
Every day of my life.
is it sad that i think every plant i pass on the highway looks like a plant from farmville?
this episode of spongebob makes me wish crabby patties were real
I shagged another guy with one ball last night. Are there really that many dudes with one nut in la or am I just a magnet for prostetic testes?
I mean we havent seen each other since december and then bam its cinco de mayo and were having sex under a life guard tower taking tequila shots between each position. no big deal
Then we all started singing, "Our house, in the middle of the street. Our house, fucks a lot of freshman meat". It was magical.
I offered to go to AA with him...not because I am admitting I have a problem but because I want to see what they are saying about people like us.
Pretty sure i didnt get thrown out cause why dont i have more bloody areas
Just ran four miles to popeye's. And back. Dedication.
Obviously he considers you not fucking him as fucking up. Thus making him fuck up. Based on this I believe he should be disqualified from the race to your vagina.
This tiny Canadian guy just tipped me $20, a piece of gum, and a joint. I wasn't working. He literally tipped me for talking to him.
He has a British accent. He could read me the phone book and I would come so hard he would need a wizened old man in a rowboat to save him.
Woke up in a fanny pack with a bag of cocaine on my cheek
Sitting naked, eating lucky charms with rain boots on
Randomize
