Yea went to the bars and he called me 2 hours later with random people saying he is at a place that i don't think exists
Jerking off has been your answer to everything tonight.
She was raised with a wonderful home life. I can't do anything with that.
I think I'm making progress on my commitment issues. I drunk made out with the same guy from last semester this weekend.
REAL PEOPLE DRINK 3 BEERS ALONE WILL WATCHING THE LIFETIME MOVIE ABOUT PRINCE WILLIAM AND KATE MIDDLETON
Next time he asks to wax your nipple while you're passed out I promise I'll be sober enough to intervene.
Highlight of the weekend: getting roundhouse kicked in the dick while switching from reverse cowgirl.
I am pretty sure I just put SoCo in the bird feeder
It might be whiskey, but I view Marge and Homer Simpson as something to strive for
You were silly, high, and chewing on things.
I'm at that point in my life where stripping isn't the worst thing I would do for money
The Olympian is in my bed
And he put my hair in my clip while i blew him...and he did a good job
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
Randomize
