redhead is getting on the bull...again red head is getting on the bull!
the only thing keeping me going right now is the knowledge that in 2 hours i'll be drunk at the circus.
I could see myself reflected in his wedding band as i was going down on him.
Is it possible to have pulled a muscle in my neck from passing out with my head in a bucket?
If your relationships aren't working out because she doesn't have a penis THEN maybe you should give dudes another go
I like it when Amish boys stare at my boobs, even tho I can't tell if it's in appreciation or disgust. Rumspringa, mothafuckers.
Just had an epiphany about how to drink more effectively in the shower. While walking across campus carrying a Franzia bag like Santa
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
dude, my hangover is telling me there was tequila involved
I mean it was fine and all but I just don't understand why a man would need all that Simon Cowell paraphanelia
I just bought the spice girls album. We will be doing music videos in the near future. You are our baby spice-- don't fight it
Either of you know why the shower was on and the bathroom door wide open with no one in there at 6 in the morning?
You kept yelling "NO CAPES" at me for no apparent reason
It's sad that I'm more proud of my Twitter account then my resume
I just paid a hobo to give me his Santa hat so I can take Christmas nudes. Will send them later, they're fire.
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