hi i'm bored and kind of... in a sort of dirty mood
pics
no i'm at a mixer dressed up as the teenage mutant ninja turtles
Let's make love on the newspapers that declare financial doomsday
Last-second stop at the drug store for lube and condoms. Clerk said "So uhmmm...that's a done deal, huh?"
High five!
she's in the bathroom throwing up right now...what is the hookup protocol after she is done? what all can I do with her?
I saw Winona at my church today. She has boobs, now.
Miracles do happen.
its 4:30 pm. In the mall. Just threw up into my hands. I love Vegas and Vegas loves me
They had an entire room dedicated to passed out people. It was like a dogpile of cross faded toddlers drooling on each other.
now that we've slept with the entire soccer team i think its time to expand the horizon.
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
I saw a crackhead in a ballerina outfit riding a bike while waving her hands and one leg in the air. Never seen such talent in my life
Cute boy and deffffff wearing a HS shirt. I am getting too old to be inaccurate.
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
He is what would appear if the douche troop all had rings and we summoned someone like the Captain Planet kids.
i got to his house for our first date at the same time as his dealer, so what I'm saying is I'm in love
My friend Julia's mom just called her to say she got a puzzle in the mail made of cheese and when she put it together it spelled FUCK YOU and she doesn't know who it's from.
Randomize
