Can I come over?
Can't... I'm at class right now.
No your not
I'm outside by your car.
Every time you buy a sobe you buy a bong.
i woke up with a wedding ring drawn on my finger...if this was vegas id be worried
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
Let's just cut to the chase. I'm not interested in anything romantic but I aAM interested in Tom Petty and maybe getting high and fucking you again for old times sake.
Yeah he doesn't get it. We had to change the subject to Keanu reeves before someone got hurt.
i honestly don't know why someone didn't cut me off after i broke the ceiling lamp with MY HEAD
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
I wouldn't blame my organs if they just decided to quit working after this weekend
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
I accidentally sent him a snapchat of my boobs and now we're going on a date tomorrow... Could be worse.
One more sleep until playoffs, Canucks are back this year, you bet your ass I'm going to uphold the tradition of being the 90 lb girl that fights every hairy ass Bruins fan at BWW.
Im gnna go loik fir my newq gay friuend now
Goodbee
I just saw your brother in some random persons yard climbing a tree. Just saying.
Probably on drugs.
Is she talking about a testicle cuff or just a cock ring? How did you meet this girl?
Is there a big difference?
It’s about the same as the difference between a night of drunken sex with a stripper at the Bellagio and being robbed and left for dead by a crystal meth tweaker
Randomize
