u ever jackoff with ur legs spread and pretend ur fuckin urself as a girl and get mad u'll never know what that feels like. Or to fly like a bird?
Did u absorb a fraternal twin in the womb?
Based on how hungover I feel today, it makes more sense that the bouncer didn't let me in to that bar.
i was laying in her brothers bed, in his old room. and i kept getting the chills. i didn't know if it was a draft or the ghosts of BJ's past.
Traveling before 21 and traveling after 21 are two different things. There's a whole nother world of red white and blue weird out there
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I don't care. I'll text you about my butthole whenever I please. That's what you signed up for in this relationship.
I just ate powdered extacy out of my wallet. I think I might have for a second of my reasonable life been on your level.
Who knew that "When in doubt, pelvic thrust" would end up being the best motto ever? In other news, I think I may have joined roller derby.
The album on my phone containing gross pictures to send when boys ask for nudes is now substantially larger than my normal photo album. Because I send one every night
75% of my food budget goes to wine, the rest to chips and salsa.
The look of disappointment from my cat while I take nudes...
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
My life is a random series of events connected only by bottles of Seagram's 7
she said. She was going to, and I quote, "put her vagina inside my dick".
Randomize
