dinner at cheesecake factory: $40. drinks at yard house: $50. having sex in the VG parking lot while people are staring at you awkwardly: priceless. Goodnight.
My penis is the apex of life and all other references. Lookin for a cheap vagina at this point. And cheap Korean BBQ
fuck yea just found my unicorn costume from when i was 8... still fits
You can't like Harry Potter and Twilight. You have to pick. Vampires and Wizards are mutually exclusive.
Ohmy god im about to fuxk my TA. i thyought this was a dream but i love you. <3
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
If the world would stop letting me feel invincible I would probably stop doing this shit.
At one point last night I over heard you say " I'm gonna puke in a bag and pour it down your throat" I LOVE YOU.
I feel like these arent even my fingers anymore
He's standing in the corner rubbing his nipples and reflecting on poor life choices
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
What the fuck were you guys talking about?
Lube wrestling.
Oh, makes sense.
Thanks for not letting me choke to death on my vomit last night
Thank you for attempting to organize my DVDs in chronological and alphbetical order
Well, if you do die, I'll bedazzle your coffin.
They picked up the lamp, held it aloft, and proclaimed apropos of nothing “this is going right up my ass”. LOUDLY
Randomize
