i just wanna soil my oats bro
we are going to smoke at least three blunts before we go see Cloudy with a chance of meatballs. I'm going to have my mom make us spaghetti for when we get out so can your mom make those spicy meatballs? I thought I'd give you 9 days notice so everything's perfect.
do you guys have 30-35 shot glasses? because if not, i don't even see a point in me coming
Had to make a piece of abstract art. Your dick is in it
I actually had fun getting arrested. That high.
Hefty paycheck and not get wasted can't exist in the same night
No, trust me. Falling down the stairs is a fucking sobering experience.
If I had to summarise my weekend I would do so using the words "horrifying romanian moonshine"
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
It's gotten to the point that when I close my eyes to cum all I see is candy crush
Walk of shaming into my apartment. No one to clap me in. Come home!
I'm bringing my passport in case we get drunk and wind up in Mexico
You had sex with a Scottish dude with a peg leg....how could I NOT tell that story??
That's the only way to watch Gumby. Either age 5 or high.
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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