Sweetheart, you've always been a horrid bitch...
Oh please, I could turn a Vienna Boys Choir concert into a shit show
Dude, this place has 10% alcohol beer on tap. It's like God's semen.
Ask him about the girl he took home Saturday night. I swear she voted for Kennedy.
She passed out in my bed last night before anything happened. She felt really bad about that, so she gave me head when we woke up this morning.
I think my penis and your vagina just became best friends last night.
we had a 10 minute conversation with his family about how I don't let him eat me out. I want to go home
all i seem to do anymore is lay around stoned, naked and eating mangoes
If everything I've heard is true, then she's lost her virginity three times
you sat in the middle of your kitchen floor feeding your dog blueberries one by one
I deleted my history right in front of my girlfriend w/out her seeing. Let's go skydiving with no parachutes. I can live thru anything.
Just finished two pages in like 20-30 mins bitches SHWAMP DRUNK LIBRARY SHWAMP
Abort mission; I repeat: Abort mission.I found an attractive one.
My mind's like "He's a sexist pig" but my uterus is like "YOU SHALL BEAR HIM STRONG CHILDREN"
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
Randomize
