The line was so long at Kum n Go some guy opened & drank 2 beers from his 12 pack while waiting.
Tomorrow will not be complet unless someone eats me out. Just sayin
But i guess when you use blowjob as a verb you are entitled to some language allowances
Dude I swear I heard "geet out!!!" when I went down on her. I shouldve listened.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
I just want to have sex and eat oreos. and then take body shots. like everyday.
DO IT, or I'll send you pictures of my hickey to remind you of your loneliness
he attacked my vagina with the force of a thousand suns
He never answered about passing his structures test no matter how I asked him. He did send a text saying that he would be "pouring alcohol into his head and balls" so I'm guessing he has to retake the whole class.
Wait do we still get bagels if no one got laid
I know it doesn't seem right, but sometimes, bagels are just flat out called for.
well he never texted me back and the pizza I took my rage out didn't deserve such malice
I sent him a tex saying, "I thought my intentions were clear" drunk me has some balls.
I fucked his roommate. And that roommate's best friend. And my roommate. And my roommate's old roommate.
i'm bowing down, but slow your roll.
I just want to see you and express my feelings in a drunken manner, but in a sweet way like my english accent.
It took him 15 minutes to put the condom on.
Randomize
