i just saw a midget buying condoms and graham crackers. i wonder which was the impluse buy.
This bar is like a mediocre whore house....but free
3 girls crying in the bathroom at the bar. Its like a Christmas song
Just for future reference: milk is NOT a good mixer no matter how drunk you are.
If you're still on campus there's a jack and coke in the bathroom of fondren science Bldg. Too strong to bring to class.
I'm sorry I ignored your high cries for help while you were grating cheese on my dog.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
I swear man, you fly across the country to give a boy your virginity and he suddenly thinks you like him
Forever getting my life back together in gas station bathrooms.
If I die at work, I want you to have my mustache collection
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
Slept on the bathroom floor again. I hope when I turn 28 I’ll stop doing that
I mean I'm completely serious and also drunk.
What a great combination.
I could be writing so much lesbian porn right now but noooooo!
Randomize
