It doesn't have to be a walk of shame...just pretend he took you to breakfast.
No one shows this much boob at breakfast
You should swallow it and be like the ticking crocodile. Only you play Still of the Night.
if you don't go to jail tommorow I'll buy you a 40. Motivation.
And then she said we stopped for a train and i tried crawling out the back window.. again, i dont remember this.
she's throwing a head of lettuce everywhere shouting HEADS UP and trying to get us to play catch with her. i'm scared.
He came to my house drunk at two a.m., got in the hot tub, refused to get out until he smoked a blunt, and said "That's what brothers and sisters are for."
It's "your husband had his mouth on my vagina" awkward.
For the first time in my life, I paid for my own alcoholic beverage last night. Am I getting ugly?
To be honest, kinda.
Will you just get over yourself and come over here and give me that dick...then you can go back home and continue to cry over us breaking up. Thank you
Meeting his dad and brother for the first time at the jail while I'm bailing him out ISN'T exactly how I pictured this relationship going....
The worst thing about him living around the corner is that who ever suggests the booty call is the one that walks over.
I can't handle more than one dick at once. I become crazy. It's hard to be mellow and free spirited and polygamous at the same time.
I love you with the passion of a thousand FUCKBOYS during the height of week 1 texting
I just had to explain my bite marks to my allergy doctor when she gave me my shots...You're the best <3
Where'd you go?
Laundry, im. A responsible drunk
Randomize
