Consumer Beware: Redhead has herpes.
Ryan Ross and Jon Walker left panic at the disco today.
I predict a mass suicide of the 14 year old girl population...
walked into the kitchen nd asked my mom what smells like tuna she replies" your sister" now i cant eat tuna...EVER!!!
Just got a lapdance on the metro. She said she was on maternity leave and needed the practice.
I don't care. He smelled like a fucking chilli cookoff
who knew that a girl that let me piss on her within 20 minutes of meeting her would get upset i couldn't remember her name.
I've already come up with two plans that will probably end with me getting kicked out of here. You guys should come faster.
Then he took his girlfriend's fuzzy handcuffs and locked me to their bed. Key is in an unknown location. He's surprisingly idiotic, for being premed.
I was the only one at the party that didn't get their name taken by the police. I'm convinced that I'm the main character of Ferris Bueller's Drunken Adventures.
hotboxing with the ex-bf's two most recent hookups. they just realized they're eskimo sisters with his best friend. this is what happens when I come home for Christmas.
idk. a stripper just bit me. I'm so disoriented
She shows up drunk at 3am for sex and then punches me straight in the eye in the middle of it because "you're too nice."
It's a little hazey but I think I tried to request Nelly last night. There was no dj. Not sure who I was talking to
Haha word. Sure I can do that. Help me find which bar has my pants and you'll get free tacos all week
Hey long story short Grandma needs bail money.
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