he just told me his nickname was "nickexplodeon"
does that mean he doesn't last long?
I just ate a whole pineapple for lunch. You should be begging to give me a bj tonight.
You were yelling at the cops across the street saying they were at the wrong party
Woke up with my face in a bowl of cereal. This is tequila's way of saying fuck you.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
I've got my wine, though it wasnt very good so I threw a sour patch kid in it
She poured beer through the deck into the hot tub. She called it a deck shot. It was horrifying but super awesome at the same time.
Dude come to her party. Someone just took a body shot of rubbing alcohol
For what it's worth, I didn't think that hitting you with a crowbar as hard as I did would break your arm like that. You should drink more milk.
So like if I threw up in my purse is that "don't ever show your face in public again" worthy or just slightly frowned upon
just give up on your dreams and come get shit house drunk with me.
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
Validation I posted a good pic? The lonely fuckboys send out the booty call signal. Of course I answered the call; Gotham needs its hero.
Apparently I bought a laptop last night, then gave the laptop to a friend who was going to give it to her friends' friend to put some cool shit on it. Anyway, I have no idea where my new laptop is now.
No I'm not high but I did cry for over an hour tonight because I realized that they never made a sequel to "Under the Tuscan Sun" with Diane Lane.
Randomize
