What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
Girls should come with a carfax report
Everything about him screamed your future.
Got high and weighed everything in the house. My head is 16.2 pounds. Is that ok?
you took my bottle from me saying i was unprepared for its magical qualities. then you buckled it in the backseat.
She keeps sending, "show me your elephant trunk."
You kept apologizing for not offering me some of your Whisky, which you referred to as "Jesus Nectar".
There's a certain feeling that only comes from wearing pearls to hide hickeys
In a bar surrounded by couples hooking up. I'm just staring at one. Not drunk enough. Come save me.
so in other words, they broke and fell off and I ate a gummy life saver off of his balls
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
He brought over a bottle of tequila and a box of donuts with the Plan B, so I guess you could say things are getting pretty serious.
Wine and a Lunchable. That would be depressing if it wasn't the pepperoni and mozzarella one. Those are the shit!
Look, you're talking to the wrong girl here. Tacos>dick always and forever
Drunk. Send nudes. Just curious.
Randomize
