look no pants
The good thing about walking home in a dress on sunday morning is that people mistake my walk of shame as a walk to God.
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
I'll be honest with you, my dick was out at that point in time.
You have permanently scared my back with your nails. I would like to congratulate you on a job well done.
we've coined the Sunday morning ritual of taking out our puke-filled trash cans as The Trash Of Shame
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
I dnt think she needs convincing on the threesome part, it's the threesome with your roommate situation that needs some work
i seriously haven't spoken to him since i drunk dialed him and told him i loved his beard
sexting while watching Peter Pan the Musical! something just doesn't seem right here
Which one of you drunk assholes put a parental lock on my cable box last night? More importantly, what's the pin? I'm missing the UK game.
I appreciate having someone to objectively critique my dick pics.
My theme for the night was drink diego drink! Unfortunately Dora was not there to navigate me to the bathroom
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
He's a wizard, there is no other explanation for how hard I came last night. None.
Randomize
