im insabelyl wasted and diont know if ill yexyed tou. call me
Everything went well, until I walked into his bedroom and there was a Ronald Reagan poster watching over his bed - creepy
TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
I should have known there'd be issues when he included "beautiful soul" in our playlist
The girl sitting next to me in class is writing her to-do list under the title 11/31.
I sharted in my sleep... I didnt even think that was possible.
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
my mom just wingman'd for me at a bar. i really don't know what else to say.
I HATE DRINKING WITH JUST GIRLS, ITS 1030 THEYRE ALL HAMMERED AND TALKING ABOUT HOW AWESOME THEIR SHOES ARE!!!!!!!
Do you have paint?
Paint? I wish
OMG WHAT ARE YOU DOING
I'm gonna eat more dunkaroos to cope with what's in my vagina.
Oh, and let me go get some popcorn, watching you make your own decisions should be quite the shitshow.
I JUST WOKE UP WITH MY UBER DRIVER
I'm always down for nudity.
Just because I know you’ll get a kick out of this, I sneezed earlier and cupcake frosting came out
Randomize
