Dear __, it'd be a lot easier to fuck if you ever responded. So I'm throwing in the white towel, since I no longer know what you want. Sincerely, ___
I still think their baby is ugly. I also still think it's yours.
I know it's getting bad when I wash the bong more often then the dishes
It was like a little tadpole swimming in the big ocean.
How do I put "special brownies" into Weight Watchers?
my brother walked in while we were fucking, silently took my bong from my closet, saluted us and walked out.
i dont care. it has been a 14 hour day, and we are all celebrating by alternating shots and grilled cheese.
He told her hed rather go bobbing for apples in puke than have sex with her.
She kept telling people I wrecked her brain. That high.
I JUST ATE A STRANGE BURRITO, I SHOULD NOT BE EXPECTED TO KNOW ANYTHING RIGHT NOW.
He actually just looked up and said I'm gonna cum in my pants. and he did. no shame.
We're only going to be this young and this cute but for so long. And how often is it that a pack of Albanian law students is in your house?!
Props to you. You took the bet seriously. Making out with her for an hour right after she spewed
You tried to wave to Meg on Family Guy and got upset because she wasn't waving back
And thank god for autocorrect cuz I can't even think in English let alone spell in it right now.
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