i'm three days dirty after drinking 14 hours last night and some other questionable behavior (hula hooping at a large concert, for example) i will just always bring the class. and the sluttiness.
see you put your penis in her and it's like an ignition key to start the crazy
She had a group on her phone called "great fucks". I was in it. It's almost like making the forbes list
yes, we have a friends with benefits thing. i found out he had never 69'd, done anal or had a threesome. i told him i was going to rock his world.
and what did he say?
there were no words. he looked like a kid on christmas morning.
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
Don't worry about it. Anal sex isn't always sunshine and wildflowers.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Dude. Her vagina is a blender.
The fact that I'm going to be living with you is starting to make me worry about my heatlh.
Ya that ship has sailed dude
i'm sad to say... seems like women around here set up their armageddon booty calls ahead of time. wanna fill all these condoms with tequila and head downtown???
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
P.s. I wore your shirt today and it has your blood all over it, but I am at a funeral home and they are using embalming fluid to get your blood stains out right now.
we are currently pregaming for our walk to the liquor store.
step one: admitting you have a problem. complete.
I think I may have gotten way too used to using my boobs as an extra hand/pocket...almost stabbed myself in the chin bc I forgot I put my fork there
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