ive been sending my husband naked pics of my whole body from my phone..its a work phone. do you think our boss can see? if so, im either getting fired, or a raise.
I know right? mind you this is the same woman who told me when I was 12 that oral sex just meant talking dirty
What would Jesus do? ... Jesus would slap a ho.
The old saying is "its not the size of the boat-- but the motion of the ocean" is obviously for those on the "Small side." I am of the belief that "You can't churn butter with a toothpick"
woke up and she was making me crepes. definitely not the last time i fuck a culinary student
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
What has two arms, one testicle and no credit card debt? This guy.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
woke up in your bed at 6 AM. on my way home I passed Nathan, bloody, barefoot, and still in a toga. He told me he woke up in a ditch then kept repeating "I'm totally bringing this up at meeting tomorrow". I'm proud of your frat today
Ordained minister or not I hereby renounce all moral responsibility for any and all related occurrences
At least I made out with him before he made out with that dog...
I was just thinking about our drunk conversation about having sex with elephants the other night. Love you bud. Stay strong.
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Success! We fucked roommates!
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
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