seagrams + popov + pineapple + milk. there, ur search for worlds worst drink is over. you're welcome
There's a 24 hour period after giving head where you can't eat penis shaped food without me laughing at you
did you know that if you have sex in the elevator on the way up that people can still get in?
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
just saw someone in just a bathrobe not even tied shut run to the bathroom with a facefull of cum. Someone had a good night
I walked in and you were laying on the floor bleeding everywhere half asleep half crying and moe was at the kitchen table eating frozen pizza refusing to acknowledge you. What a sight.
We were messing around at his place it was going fine until he said, "I'm going to cum, hand me the shot glass"
The ratio of last drink to last smoke is so tricky. This could go on until the booze is gone
Apparently you missed the drunkest me ever documented. I slept on the hardwood floor and left my pants on the porch to give u a frame of reference.
my head feels like a yellow yolk spinning in a circle at the bottom of the bowl.. i may have a concussion, love auto correct
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
I just tripped over a but plug that was on the floor. It's 430 in the morning
All I know is that I got to have an orgasm yesterday during sex so nobody can put a damper on my day, NOBODYYYYYY
I fucked him on shrooms. His dick looked like a missile and he had snakes coming out of his ears. It. Was. AWESOME!
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