I thnk I just saw a monkey walking a drunk guy.
the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
Jesus can read your poker face... He is not pleased
If I ever start a band I'm gonna name it "Nancy Reagan's Vagina"
Why do you proceed to call me "Queen La Queefah?"
we just pregamed for our presentation... gotta love group bonding
I would have to gauge my vagina to make it fit.
to whom it may concern. if i am dead in colleens bed it is not her fault i slept in my scarf. my dads middle name is ronald.
Now I get the fucking shakes every time I hear I'm Sexy And I Know It. Thanks, Captain Morgan.
Make the kitchen floor stop waving. Im trying to lay on it
I don't know but this 12 year old kid is soaking up all of our bad morals like a super tampon on the second day of my period
If I show up to the mall alone looking like I do to purchase a vibrator and some Japanese food, I would judge me too.
That's what I love about being a lesbian. My roommate's boyfriend watched her finger me and then he made me pancakes in the morning. AND THEN HE LEFT.
He dared you to draw a map of the USA on your wall in mustard. You drew something that vaguely resembled a velociraptor eating Oklahoma, got embarrassed because you forgot how to spell America, then hid out in the coat closet until everybody left.
yeah we're all naked, and I think we just shaved Chad.
Randomize
