just saw a prosititute with a baby stroller...question is...if the baby wakes up is the blow job free?
Is it sad that the only reason I haven't lapsed into depression is that I'm prettier than her?
Nah, we all need something.
I'm pretty sure that every show on ABC Family could be turned into a drinking game.
suntimes in life you find a rare opportunity, mine was bonin my gf in front of the tv
I'm ready for my liver to be the last casualty of 2009
He shit in the bushes next to the pool at the Venetian, after throwing up in the hallway. You really can do anything in Vegas.
airport. 106 proof japanese liquor. 4 little travel size containers. im proud to be smarter than the average american.
She came home wasted 'not wantin to talk about it' so for revenge I woke her up with a dutch oven and she puked all over me and the bed. I can't win.
Dude I told you 22 year olds shouldn't get married
I think she must be bulimic. I mean, every time I see her I know i want to throw up.
Fuck. The basement bathroom I've been getting head in for 6 months just went 'Out of Service'.
She seriously pointed at the couch and asked me if she could "ride the talking giraffe". I'll never serve everclear again.
All I want to do is sleep. And If I'm not sleeping, I want to be eating or fucking. I'm pretty sure being pregnant has turned me into a dude.
Walking in on a gay threesome, with a girl in the corner watching and taking vid is a reason to not only knock, but to never go to Savannah.
I walked into the bathroom and there's this 6'5" cop washing his hands. He looks at me and goes, "Heard you singing outside. Sound real pretty."
No more tequila EVER.
i am craving dick and cupcakes
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