Texts From Last Night · Random Texts

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(515): View more from Iowa

He fucking owes me dinner after I gave him head under the deck behind the bar.

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(248): View more from Michigan

she did the YMCA with her lgs... i think she forgot she wasnt wearing any underwear

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(443): View more from Maryland

His IQ is so high, I swear I started ovulating when he told me the number.

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(724): View more from Pennsylvania

Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.

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(425): View more from Washington

Where the royal fuck are you??

(1-425): View more from Washington

The depths of vodka hell.

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(301): View more from Maryland

And then he said "if you were planning on bird feeding me that's not ok"

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(757): View more from Virginia

Moonshine marathon is never a good idea

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(425): View more from Washington

She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.

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(423): View more from Tennessee

You left me a note that said "The Earth is blowing up. Bring the Rosé." WTF.

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