hide the guitars, Nate just learned to play free fallin'
I'm not high anymore, I decide when it's done.
Well yea but it's the principle of the thing.. The fact that he could actually BE your daddy
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
When you put it that way it sounds like my vagina is a parking garage to be monitored by security guards
It was like the Alcoholic Olympics...double fisting fifths with eight 40s in my backpack...running from the cops in stilettos. I will have bitchin' hamstrings come Monday.
High water is the most godliest tasting water in the world.
Haha. Last winter I went through this phase where id go to the bars with my own giant goblet and demand to be served white wine and red bull hah
It's fucking New Year's. I can be soberish in 2013 after tonight. It's like the 30 years of grey area between Jesus' birth and death.
I look like shit btw. Like the joker from Batman.
I'm not sure how that's possible unless you put on face paint. Which I would respect.
Hey, I'm making progress. I haven't thrown up in a bar while wearing a sweater vest in almost two months.
You guys are like the reason that ketamine is a controlled substance.
I went out to dinner with the girls thinking I'd be home early. Instead I ended up in the Englishman's hotel room. Long Live The Queen.
i just called dibs on the taxi driver at the bar that isnt drinking. im a grown up
We had an argument over whether or not she had super strength. She settled it by dragging me to the bed room and throwing me on the bed. Then forcefully fucking me. She won the argument.
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