Just because we buy weed together doesn't mean were a couple
The tornado sirens were going off and everyone just ran to the liquor store. .
why the fuck would he compare you to sexy aquatic creatures?
There's a big hole in the wall at the dining hall. I hope we didn't do
party gras won. party gras always wins.
his life revolves around getting high and answering people on yahoo answers. he's perfect for you.
I concluded last night that you have no tear ducts, heart, or sense of any feeling.
WHY IS MY CAR MISSING A DOOR YOU BITCH
budget cuts
YOU CANT BLAME EVERYTHING YOU DO WHILE DRUNK ON BUDGET CUTS
budget cuts are serious business
I'm truly not mad that he's at a strip club, it's that he couldn't look far enough into the future to figure out how to get himself home from one
Times have changed. Freshman year I could throw my shirt in a bonfire and still get laid. Now when I puke in my girlfriend's bed on her birthday I'm "an asshole"
sweet sixteen by hillary duff just came on and i feel like i let lizzie mcguire down for being such a stoner
Fucking suck it up and drink your feelings like a normal human being.
Is it sacrilegious to take tequila shots on Saint Patrick's day?
When we were fucking he called me by his moms name then after we were done told me to call him. He's not receiving a call... What if his mom picks up?
If I have put a neon “vacancy” sign on my skirt for him to get the picture I will.
Randomize
