I'm really into asian looking animals
I just got stood up by an 18 yr old. fmylife.
my friend asked What a UTI was in front of everyone, letts just say his girlfriend was a lil pissed
Getting drunk now, but later remind me to tell you how to crash an 8th grade grad party.
HE KEEPS WALKING AWAY. IT'S LIKE HE DOESN'T EVEN LIKE FRIES. WTF.
Just saw him riding in a basket on the front of a bike trying to feed the other guy beer. He screamed 'PARTY BIKE BITCHES!' at me as they rode past.
I lied. He's hitting on a drag queen now. Should I rescue him or take pictures?
It's like a puppy that we have to take care of at all times or else she'll get sad, lonely, and chew on the furniture. And by 'chew on the furniture', I mean have anonymous sex.
We fist bumped behind their backs while drunk hooking up with them... Do other girls do this too? Or is it just us?
I'm thinking about slathering myself with peanut butter and going to the dog park. What's the worst that could happen?
i'm about to be the still-drunkest person on the ellipticals
I rather not break my neck. It's hard to look sexy with a neck cast.
Well yeah. But im not sure i trust the black out drunk high girl giving life advice
Also either i just launched into space as a rocket or my legs just orgasmed, but i am high as a soul train
I got really worried when i woke up and there weren't any missed booty calls from him between 3 and 5 am. Apparently his gf is in town ...
I think my roomie is silently judging me for spraining my foot by having sex in a bounce house
so the bounce house and tequila was good idea then?
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