where are you
in your bedroom
how did you get in
your wife…
WTF
All of his creepy stalker friends want you too
But i just feel like he will pull it out and ill panic. I mean its fairly basic. Up and down. But i feel like ill just freak out.
i barfeds in our rink
office poll is still running 100% that Spencer Pratt is more disturbing than David Carradine's death
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
Just made everyone at my party download the vuvuzela app for iPhone, the neighbors absolutely HATE us
Alright, so what's my next move? I already posted a Milli Vanilli video on her wall
She cut off the top of a watermelon and is now eating it with a spoon. She's more than half done.
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
And to top it off I think that was the first time in history that anyone has used "oh just taking care of her grandmother and doing porn" in the same sentence.
My fall semester strategy is to submit my papers with a nude selfie
You've got post-grad studies written all over you
Sorry for throwing up in your humidifier last night, I thought it was some sort of electrical garbage can
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
You know you have an interesting job when you go to work and have to Google search "How to get poop out of a dryer".
Randomize
