i'm touring the leper colony via mapquest street view so we dont have to go there
i think i just witnessed the elusive male walk of shame
our school mascot just walked into class and threw condoms everywhere. welcome to college
Why is there 6 cases of kwic trip dounuts dumped in my bed? Best 34 dollar wake up of my life
you were making out, puked over his shoulder and insisted everything was okay
I'm officially "accidentally set myself on fire" drunk
just a question.. totally understand if you dont know what im talking about.. but.. do you have my funnel? i think i tucked it in to your bed last night.
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
You know just sitting here carrying on a conversation with a 5 yr old about why there is puke at the landing of the staircase
also, made a drinking game out of my birthday photos....drink everytime alcohol is in a photo. going through all 350 of them.
Me, him and the recently stolen carpet walked down the road and into the strip club. We had to check the carpet with our coats, it didn't mind missing out too much, later the door guy at Subway held carpet during late night sandwich selection.
Let's get a hotel room this time. I really don't want to sleep in a Dennys parking lot again.
All I remember is while we were making out M.A.A.D City came on so I pushed him off of me so I could rap along.
of fours songebofy did dknt stop believing
how legible are my texts
I bet you my entire life savings of $0 that there's a Doctor Who porn parody and that it features the sonic screwdriver being inserted into some cavities
Randomize
