good. and stop kissing my girl you dirty slut.
i don't think she's still your girl..plus, she kept screaming "kiss me! i'm a lesbian!" last night so i think you're outta luck..
Saw an eatery called Rusty Taco. That sooo could be me.
someone who i have in my phone as thundercock just said he was DTF
Just found my old bop it. So many drinking game possibilities
Dude. Remember the only two rules I set for that? Always have a sober friend and don't do drugs with a fat chick.
You guys can't keep having sex with them and cleaning their house! They're never going to take you seriously!
Her vagina smelled like pancake batter. That's all you need to know.
She had YOLO tattooed on her ass. Like, one cheek said YO, the other said LO. Even I can't handle that level of hot mess.
it's just not right when you're boyfriend has a nicer ass than you do.
I woke up last night a kitchen floor with my shirt off and I love America written on my leg in eye liner
I know he's not here, but I can still see him. I found some of my old stash and its good shit so its expected to see sunlight at night and scary llama men. Midgets or otherwise.
...and that's why girls with IBS don't paint their nails
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
you were walking down the sidewalk and just puked. didnt even stop or slow down and just kept going. i was so impressed i didnt even tell anyone you threw up on passing peoples shoes.
Yep, you're going to hell.
I take on this great possibility with a beer in one hand and the girl I'm gonna fuck later in the other
Randomize
