Just used my last prints at the library for brackets instead of final reviews. Hello March.
The guy is drinking 5 bottles of beer in a juice pitcher. Fucking amazing.
A burger king employee called me from your phone while you were on their bathroom floorl. Hope ur not in jail....4 realz
Apprently after I bit that bouncer, it all went down hill.
Two women at the Safeway just got out of their separate cars and kissed. One was driving an outback, the other a CRV. It was like a Honda and Subaru had a lesbian joint venture and filmed the commercial in front of me.
Ran out of plates, so I'm using my sociology notes. Looks like they will finally have a practical use.
Running late for a date because I couldn't get my clothes out from under the dude I spent the night with in time to leave when I planned. This is my life.
This is classic penis vs brain.
All's fair in love and war. and tinder.
ANIME MEN ARE MAKING ME QUESTION MY SEXUALITY AGAIN
He says the sweetest things but also that he wants to choke me when we fuck so it's kinda perfect.
Ran up to the dollar store to get batteries for my vibrator. Happy Valentines Day!
My cats name is now jello shot. How much do you love me right now?
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Btw I puked in your glovebox
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