VAGINAS EVERYWHERE
they're staring at me
Black thong, sheer white shorts not a professional look. This chick has no idea what sunlight makes her outfit look like.
I would like to thank collapsed soviet republics and fathers who didnt show enough attention for tonight's festivities
I just got wrote up for "repeatedly smelling like alcohol"
That was long passed due.
Stuck behind a lady in her 70's purchasing a plastic handle of vodka and nothing else. She is writing a check. Hello future.
as nice as a boyfriend sounds, a relationship would require morals and self-restraint - both fields in which i lack.
momma always taught us never to change for a boy..
I've reached the point to where my pre-gaming needs to be limited to pre-inning-ing
a guy just walked up to us....drank the rest of my beer....and said sorry for my loss before walking away.
We're high and this subject came up and I'd like a female opinion: if you were a dude, what would you do if a girl tried to give you a foot job?
I'm really stoned in my underwear. I probably won't make it to the bar.
Why are you awake at 6am and liking photos from rando Russian chicks on Instagram?
Just pulled a Kenny Powers on a snowmobile
I threw up in my brother's Easter basket
Dignity. Ruined. Must. Smoke. Weed.
when i woke up with rugburns on the tops of my feet, knees, and chin i was a little confused. and then i remembered i had sex with him in his friends walk in closet.
Randomize
