Some girl just asked us for directions back to campus. we told her to take the first four lefts. We live on a block. she believed us
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
You guys need to get along, there is no need for a pissing contest...We're all fucking each others ex's.
There is a literally infinite number of spliffs going around this table.
Delicious
I feel like I'm at a sushi bar with a spliff belt.
Yes ma'am. At least you're a warning story I can tell to my kids in the future
Dont worry bro, i'll be the designated kayaker. I wouldnt want u to be drinking and kayaking.
Can I send you a picture of my penis? I feel like it looks really good right now and I need someone to share it with
Everyone heard you having sex but I just told them you were having a nightmare.
Where can I buy a stripper pole at midnight on a Sunday?
Seriously considering modifying my computer case so it can dispense wine. I need to make a bunch of changes and reorganize it's guts anyway....
WE HAVE WINE WHERE ARE YOU GUYS WE ARE BY THE GIANT EAGLE
This is why I can't take dates to shows... I've literally made out with everyone in this band. And two of the guys in the crowd. And the bartender.
The most awkward thing in the morning is seeing your teacher's dick right before you go to his class.
Apparently we fucked, I kicked him out, then he came back and we did it on the coffee table and in the kitchen.
I ACCIDENTALLY MURDERED MY COUSIN
HOW DO YOU ACCIDENTALLY MURDER YOUR COUSIN
Randomize
