Ok love is a little strong. But he consented to Nachos, beer and board game date with my cats. Keeper.
The last thing I remember is yelling "ill handle this" while wearing a lion suit and holding a jug of vodka when the RAs came
he laminated a picture of his dick.
Single person behavior: I wanted a cookie but was too lazy to make or go buy any, so I let cookie dough ice cream melt and ate all the chunks. Pantsless.
Well, I found my bra. It's in my glove compartment with a half-eaten Snickers bar and a Jesus bookmark.
you owe me at least a beer for the services my girlfriend just provided for you
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
I asked him why he was eating an entire can of refried beans, the only answer I got was "revenge"
A lumberjack bearing the gift of small oranges or gymnast sex... I love you man but you lose that battle 9 out of 10
I sent "Rawrrrr" to 151 matches on Tinder. I feel like thats a substantial size of the DC female population.
I'm wearing fairy wings and I broke my wizard staff. If this isn't the most happy but sad moment of my life , I don't know what is.
I thought it was pretty weird, but after the marinating loins thing, i figured i'd roll with it.
I found your birth control, it was in your Crown Royal bag.
i think you might have coined the term "slightly awkward pyromania"
I ate cake in bed. Felt great
Randomize
