grinding to god bless the USA? really?
shut up
I think we should start referring to bisexuals as "strays"
To this day, he introduces me as "the girl I met climbing trees at 3 A.M."
Ever since I told them the story of the sex in the canoe scandal its like I am in season
Girl your like that last load of laundry... I'll do you eventually just not tonight.
He was president of his frat and had a clap on disco ball in his room... or course I slept with him
I told my doctor about us having twin chlamydia
I can always pull a half day at work too. My boss makes exceptions for drug use. Lol. I fucking love my job.
That jawline could fucking have its way with me.
apparently I kept repeating I have a to do list this summer and he's on it
I've decided if you aren't here in fifteen minutes I'm leaving you for Mario the 75 year old Colombian bartender.
good news, i've got tacos. bad news, kevin's in the ER. more good news, the tacos were free.
Caitlin, you were laying in your bed feeding your dog ritz chips and singing a whole new world at 4am loud enough your neighbors came over an asked you to stop.
I love my life
i was sitting on the kitchen floor shaking my gallon of vodka at people and asking if they wanted to climb the heaven hill... getting dumped is the best thing that has ever happend to me
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
Randomize
