I have my period so I felt bad and blew him with cash cab in the background. I wanted to yell out the answers but my mouth was full.
And hes hitting me with his balls, really hard.
Captain Phil from deadliest catch died... im trying to think of a memorial fb status but "ill miss your crabs" doesnt sound right
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
These fall allergies are really hindering my cocaine habit.
He told me since I'm into organics I should know his meat is known locally for its quality and hes hand raised it since age 13.
Did u see the proverb she left as a comment on my picture?
Day 1 of "Death of a Liver" weekend complete. It came with flashbacks of horrible mistakes I made due to alcohol. I'm excited for how Sunday is going to turn out.
I feel like David Hasselhoff when he's drunk eating that cheeseburger and crying. But with cheesecake.
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I have just received a gold-medal-deserving sext. He wrote me a fucking novel. Not only am I incredibly turned on but I am beyond impressed. He is the sext god. I must bow to him.
He said that we couldn't refer to each other as brother and sister anymore cuz we were in no way related and he would love nothing more than to get naked with me.
You're an adult now and it's your vagina. You should do what it or you wants.
The cat hopped on my bed and watched me masturbate naked with a vibrator. I've never felt more sorry in my entire life
Turns out tits aren't quite as effective an enticement when they know for a fact that they can't touch.
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