It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
I dont shave on purpose to keep myself from being slutastic!! it usually works
1 of the best things of being a business owner is I don't get fired for having sex in the office
Me and a lesbian played "may the best man win" over a bi chick tonight... I lost, still fun though
My favorite part was walking in the bathroom, you fixing yourself in the mirror, calling your reflection a fag, then throwing a haymaker into the paper towel dispenser before going back out to the bar.
Just walked in on the Yellow Ranger getting porked by a guy in a UD Blue Hen costume. Will somebody PLEASE think of the children.
She's never going to forget it... Christmas Anal.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
I just want to jump into a ballpool of dicks now.
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
It's take your daughter to work day... I really shouldn't be here right now
I did my walk of shame through a safeway at 8am to get YOUR hangover bagels. You're welcome asshole
You better fucking tell me or I'm turning blow job week into go fuck yourself week.
Also I feel like death. But like. In a good way
Come on baby if you haven't had a Charleston chew eatin out of your ass you just ain't livin right.
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