How young is too young to ask my kid to make me a drink?
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
i find it simply astounding you spelled drunken wrong but pterodactyl right
He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
We waited til after. Not even drunk sex felt right during a Disney movie.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
Either there is a god and he hates masturbation, or one of my roommates stole my vibrator while I was in the shower.
I'm confused are we getting high or did someone actually die?
Stop trying to get a gf and raw dog some forest beasts like sasquatch
We got high and watched Winnie the Pooh. Isn't that what every normal person does on their break?
He was on top and as he finished he yelled "I love gold" , so yeah I'm seeing him later tonight
Headphones came off my phone same time as The Weeknd sang "Who's gonna fuck you like me?"...Everyone at work heard it.
Fuck you, dude, I'm not sharing my weed anymore if you're going for the Panthers.
I'm glad he doesn't have a bigger dick because he'd just use it for evil anyway
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
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