You really coming over, don't trick.
He saved me in his phone as Easy Jen. Should I be offended?
I wouldn't worry about it. He has me as "Sex Puppet."
Is it gay to rub my penis between my butt cheeks and pretend that they're tits?
Wow! You need to get laid.
He says he's "masters drunk." And if that's anything like "kentucky derby drunk" I know enough to not go over there.
Lol. Awesome. Seriously though, I need you focused next year. We're gone have a lot of drinking and stupid nonsense to do, and I don't want dumb shit like responsibility to get in my fucking way.
the upside of dating someone over 21: he can buy me a pregnancy test AND a bottle of wine when he goes to cvs for me
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Just saw a woman trying to order Mcdonalds at a trash can. God bless America.
Dude. Going to the Theme park the day after the 4th of July was the worst idea I've ever had.
What procrastination leads to: I have submitted a third of my job applications this week with a BAC that would get me arrested
If you saw or spoke to me yesterday can you message me. Trying to make a timeline of the day I was too drunk to remember
I gotta give him props though, I've never been propositioned for sex via flash mob.
I just made some sangria and taking a roadie on my stroller walk around the hood! Parenting at its finest
oh what is to come when my single life starts with a threesome?
It was just a hint of nipple. I kept it classy!
Do you even hear yourself?
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