So do you want to come over? ;)
Never again opening up the Pandora's box of crazy that is your vagina. Sorry.
I keep trying to sit and the chair keeps running away from me
I convinced her san diego was a state. all the proof I needed was saying, why do they call it san diego state university?
Just wrote the directions to get to the girls house im hooking up with on the back of my marriage certificate. Officially worst husband ever.
I swear to God, I just heard my guardian angel tell us to stop. I think we should listen.
he got a charlie horse midthrust which triggered my orgasm we're still sorting this out.
Not many best friends can say they've all made out with a homeless guy
Seriously, I'm ready to settle for ugly and unemployed as long as he has decent hygene and likes to go down.
I feel a bullet train of disappointment headed in your direction.
As sure as my left ball is bigger then my right. We will have our moment.
I also just told a guy I was available for counseling in case he needed to 'bang' things out. I've become a monster.
OH FOR FUCKS SAKE! SOMEONE TOOK ME FOR A GODDAMN PROSTITUTE!! IM WEARING LEG WARMERS!!! THAT IS LIKE THE LEAST HOOKERISH THING TO WEAR!
Goddamnit Shari. He's not called Pencil Dick because he's good a sketching...
sidebar: i fucked your brother last night
He said did you just interrupt me midsentence to admire another man's penis?
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