im 80% sure the guy across from me is taking pictures of my legs
): 100 percent naked, unless you count a tiara as clothing.
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
I'm a big fan of your penis but I will not sit through an animated movie dedicated to it.
I lost track of him after he threw the handful of pennies at the 2 female cops and ran into the darkness. I heard a tazer and a scream. All that is left is his flip flop. Its like hes drunken man-derella.
He was uncircumcised
It was like inception. A penis within a penis within a penis
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
And then, I saw the prophecy come to fruition. It was the Dick of Destiny.
BEHOLD THE MORNING PIGEON
SANCTIFY THE CHALK TADPOLE
THERE IS NO SOBRIETY. ONLY ZUUL.
I'm not sure we can use safewords tho. She smokes so much she had to keep asking what the safewords was. Bondage and bongs don't mix
Everyone was soo nice and genuine.. Then again it coulda just been the drugs.
found one of my socks in the dishwsaher... xanax
My frontal lobe is being piloted by Jack Daniels right now.
I shit like a lady though so that rarely happens
Why does my mask smell like doritoes?
Randomize