I got called a slut by a bunch of girls that work at Hooters..wtf is that shit? explain that to me
Ok im wearing a joe flacco jersey and full stick on unibrow and hardly anyone else dressed up omg
Omg suz!! take the unibrow off
No! im just getting hammered instead
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
My RA tried to compliment my pong tables design after he confiscated it
It's offcial there's a Bobby Light radio station on pandora.
Those were the days I had no morals... Dark times.
Shall we take a trip back?
No, I don't just love you because you have big boobs. I just wouldn't visit as often.
He stood me up.
I'm no sure if I should be pissed or proud that he finally grew a backbone.
I'm so incredibly high right now the fact I am texting is nothing short of miraculous. Call the Pope. Hell make me Saint Roy, patron of stoners.
If it wasn't for the fact that I drink during my lunch break I'm pretty sure I would have quit this job by now
It's a sad statement on my day when the high point was getting a pap test.
Let's get drunk and take out your tonsils tonight
How many times do I have to tell you I'm not bisexual.
.....unless there is alcohol involved
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
Spent like 2 minutes so far learning and 35 minutes in a group chat talking about big asses. Yet another Wed zoom meeting.
Randomize
