The two bassists just totally made out. I NEED MENNA'S RIGHT now.
He can't get past my hymen. At least that's what he said it feels like.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
I still havent given him the valentines day card i got him. I feel like just writting...."sorry for the horrible blow job i gave u last night." and just giving it to him.
I really think we need to get on this Charlie Sheen bandwagon
Dreamed I made out with a stranger after falling out of a car, let's make this happen tonight.
can't blv i tried using a "backpack" as a unit of measurement...i drank a lot of beer last night
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
Youll thank me when youre dead an dont have a cat eating your face
He can only pee with the faucet running. It's like I'm dating a fucking toddler.
My dad handed me a drink and said, "This'll knock your dick in the dirt..."
my new game is to try to use the phrase "explosion in your mouth". as much as possible on tinder.
She proceeded to flip everyone off then open a Heineken with her teeth.
Yeah we've been texting but I don't know how to just randomly throw in sooo the real reason this is happening is because i hear you're a drug dealer
There's so many drinking games in the Olympics.
you missed out this chick was licking her paddle
Randomize
