He said I taste like butterscotch, licked me, then I'm pretty sure he wet his pants. So no, I do not want to invite him over.
He puts stickers to promote his new shirt company in every sack he sells. He's like the donald trump of weed
I knew his night was already over when he started marking lines on the bottle and setting goals
he payed over $300 just to break into the hotel pool and skinny dip alone for 5 minutes and then peace in a cab. and all he had to say for himself was "gotta go swimming, gotta live life"
where do u find these people!?
Everyone loves nachos, first of all. Second, Ke$ha is entirely appropriate for the age grou too young to realize she probably has Hep C.
Technically ya I did. Hes tried to get down my pants like 3 times now and every time I have been all "these are not the Droids you are looking for"
Well after the shots I danced with a homeless guy, split my toe on broken glass, and had a 20 piece mcnugget. Who says postgrad life is boring.
You might have to deal with a coked up ex pan American gold medalist wrestler when you get back to the room
I've been to his house multiple times since that night and I STILL can't find my bra. And he says the hot tub ate my thong.
I need to reevaluate my stance on weekday hangovers...
He fucked me while wearing his night time breathing machine mask. Does this mean I joined the dark side and he is Darth Vader?
What the hell happened to the sandwich meat I just bought?
After you smoked, you made 8 ham sandwiches.
Guess that explains the mysterious disappearance of the bread...
My vagina cried when he left. I think she's about to be at war with my self respect.
Taking a shot every time the Russian in COD says vodka... BEST drinking game ever.
She really wants to hug you. With her vagina.
Randomize
