just as he was about to cum he started shouting "I THINK I CAN! I THINK I CAN!" over and over again.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
Literally just stood in the shower and forgot what to do. that hungover.
Also, my drunkenly packed sleepover kit consisted of a singular sock, my uncharged laptop, and a pack of post-it notes.
Driving a mountain pass in the middle of a blizzard with the worst vodka gummybear hangover ever is gods way of telling me to keep the black-outing within a 15 mile radius to my house.
I think I'm still drunk and I think you were in my dream (sadly, it was not a sexual bill murray one).
So, since you're now a four night stand, I feel comfortable asking: Did I leave my sunglasses at your house? Or my underwear?
He's sweet and rough. A wonderful contradiction. He's the starburst of sex.
you missed 2am bagpipes and my roommate looking hot as fuck in a kilt
What good is being a girl if you can't terrorize boys with pregnancy scares??
you know you're drunk when you start breaking down your body composition into organic molecules
She's still mad at me for saying she looked pregnant and not getting her chicken nuggets.
we bonded over knowing every word to freaky gurl by gucci mane so it’s kinda starting to make sense why I gave him head in his cul de sac
I could not add him. He gets 5 likes on Instagram.
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
Randomize
